a friend of mine sent me these. every now and then, i pull the copy out and laugh…
(church bulletin/announcement bloopers)
Bertha Belch, a missionary from Africa will be speaking
tonight at Calvary Memorial Church in Racine.
Come tonight and hear Bertha Belch
all the way from Africa.
Announcement in the church bulletin for a
National PRAYER & FASTING conference:
“The cost for attending the Fasting and Prayer
conference includes meals.”
Our youth basketball team is back and in action
Wednesday at 8 pm in the recreation hall. Come out
and watch us kill Christ the King.
Miss Charlene Mason sang
“I will not pass this way again” giving obvious
pleasure to the congregation.
“Ladies, don’t forget the rummage sale. It’s
a chance to get rid of those things not worth
keeping around the house. Don’t forget your husbands.”
Next Sunday is the family hayride and bonfire at the Fowlers’.
Bring your own hot dogs and guns.
Friends are welcome! Everyone come for a fun time.
The peacemaking meeting scheduled for today
has been canceled due to a conflict.
The sermon this morning: “Jesus walks on the water”
The sermon tonight: “Searching for Jesus”.
Next Thursday there will be tryouts for the choir.
They need all the help they can get.
Barbara remains in the hospital and needs blood donors
for more transfusions. She is also having trouble sleeping
and requests tapes of Pastor Jack’s sermons.
During the absence of our Pastor, we enjoyed
the rare privilege of hearing a good sermon
when J.F. Stubbs supplied our pulpit.
The Rector will preach his farewell message
after which the choir will sing
“Break forth into Joy.”
Remember
in prayer the many who are sick of our community
Smile at
someone who is hard to love. Say “hell” to someone
who doesn’t care much for you.
Don’t let worry kill you off–
let the church help you.
Irving Benson and Jessie Carter were
married on October 24 in the church. so
ends a friendship that began in their
school days.
A bean supper will be held on Tuesday
evening in the church hall. Music will
follow.
At the evening service tonight, the sermon topic will be
“What is Hell?”
Come early and listen to our choir practice.
For those of you who have children and don’t know it,
we have a nursery downstairs.
The Luteran men’s group will meet at 6pm. steak, mashed potatoes,
green beans, bread and dessert will be served for a nominal feel.
Please place your donation
in the envelope along with the deceased
person(s) you want remembered.
Attend and you will hear an excellent speaker
and heave a healthy lunch.
The church will host an evening
of fine dining, superb entertainment, and
gracious hostility.
Potluck supper Sunday at 5 pm.–prayer
and medication to follow.
The ladies of the church
have cast off clothing of every kind.
They may be seen in the basement
on friday afternoon.
This evening at 7 pm there will
be a hymn sing in the park across from the church.
Bring a blanket and come prepared to sin.
Low Self Esteem support group will meet Thursday at
7 pm. Please use the back door.
Weight Watchers will meet at 7 pm at the First
Presbyterian Church. Please use the large double doors at
the side entrance.
The pastor would appreciate it if the ladies of the congregation
would lend him their electric girdles for the pancake breakfast
next Sunday morning.
The eighth-graders will be presenting
Shakespeare’s Hamlet in the church basement friday at 7pm.
The congregation is invited to attend this tragedy.
Mrs. Johnson will be entering the hospital this week for
testes.
The Associate Minister unveiled the church’s new tithing
campaign slogan last Sunday:
“I upped my pledge…Up Yours.”
Our next song is “Angels We Have Heard Get High”
